by Amir Hafizi
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Today’s weddings are purely egotistical, in the sense it is done simply to show off to other people, or to maintain ‘face’ value, which is not real value. The truth remains that no matter how successful your wedding is, if your marriage sucks, it sucks. Especially if the foundation is pure fakery and delusion.

A wedding nowadays can cost you anywhere between RM30,000 - RM120,000 for us normal people. For the ‘special ones’, you might be spending around RM1-RM3 million.  I say screw expensive weddings.

This is okay if you’re rich, but if you’re a loser like most of us, why the hell should we spend so much on a wedding anyway? I have friends who got into serious debt problems for having lavish weddings they could not afford.

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Here are some suggestions for low-cost weddings that will not drain you financially. Plus, 2012 is supposed to be the year when the world economy collapses or something, so these might just be a lifesaver for all you people who are unlucky enough to get married.

Facebook Wedding
Almost everyone is on Facebook, including your grandmother. So, just hire a photographer, rent some wedding dresses and suits, then take some pictures. Post all the pix on your Facebook and then tag everyone you want to tag. Since the original intention of weddings is simply to announce to people of your union, Facebook might be the best place for it. Or start a Facebook Page for your wedding.
Cost: RM5,000 (good professional wedding photographers are hard to find)

Website Wedding
Something like a Facebook Wedding, but more sophisticated, with streaming live video, photos and a customised URL like, If you’re really poor, just get a blog.
Cost: RM5,500

Barbecue Wedding
Instead of spending RM20 per head (average cost in KL), you ask the guests to cook their damn bloody dinner. This will keep the list small and the effort can discourage people from eating too much, especially if you intentionally burn some of the food.
Cost: RM2,000 for a crowd of 400.

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Potluck Wedding
Instead of actually buying the food, ask people to bring their own damn food to the wedding. Sharing is caring.
Cost: less than RM1,000.

The Model-T Wedding
This is the best story. A friend of mine, who shall not be named, is the niece of a top man in the government. She got married to a rock star. Her wedding was at the Bangsar mosque, and attended by three guests.
The costs incurred simply included drinks and a few kuihs for everyone, including very close family members. However, her betrothal was covered in an English daily. Not bad, huh, for about RM12.50?

So, take your pick. I hope that more and more people would go for these types of weddings right now and in the future. Save your money for the real important stuff, like property, retirement funds, insurance, investments and your children’s education funds.